chickens, babies, and a bit about being short

We are wrapping up a busy week with what promises to be an eventful weekend. On Sunday there will be big party in our village. A local Haitian-run micro-finance program has planned a celebration of their 1-year anniversary. More than 300 people have been involved in this lending program. It's a good thing. They’ve asked us to be there. 

This morning Jenn competed in a 4k fun-run in downtown Cap Haitien. Guess who took first place among the females? Yep. Ms. Jenn Schenk took the prize. 

Tonight a friend is celebrating his birthday. It's almost midnight and I'm still hearing the kompa music and the sounds of lingering party guests coming from the apartment next door. 

I don't bring up races and parties for nothing. This particular friend happens to be a PhD student and has been kind enough to consult with us regarding our chickens and their diet. He and Jenn contrived a plan to better balance the our chickens' diet using food sources that have the potential to be more sustainable and less expensive. 

We are always looking for ways to improve the chicken's health and nutrition but at the moment we aren’t having any major problems. The chickens are producing big, beautiful brown eggs so delicious that they are flying off the shelves faster than those ladies can lay. 

Errod, a SMH staff member, has added chicken care to his repertoire of responsibilities. He’s been getting special training and has definitely taken ownership of the egg production process. He works hard to make the egg business as successful as it can be. It’s his job to monitor how many eggs the hens lay per day, to oversee their food supply, and to procure all feed elements before we run out. He even delivers the eggs to customers. 

Recently, with money from the Holiday Catalog, we did an upgrade on the chicken pen to include a cement base (for easy cleaning). Besides the cement the pen elements are pretty organic. The ground is lined with rice shells and the roof was created with dried palm leaves. It’s much nicer than the salvaged wire barricade we put up the first time and much bigger than the bamboo pen we used for our very first 20 chickens. Those temporary pens cost next to nothing  since we used materials left over from construction. But since we now have 120 chickens an upgrade was definitely in order.  It was time. 

before, old coop


during, the sugar cane canopy was built by a local man...
we told him we liked the canopy he had at his place and then hired him to make one for us

The chickens seem pretty content in their new space. 

Moms

We are currently working with four families. 

#1 Daniel Tiny Daniel is stable and getting bigger by the day.  He is almost 4 months old. This was his third full week at Second Mile (for a total of 3 1/2 weeks). 

His mother was having issues breastfeeding during Daniel’s first 3 months. When she came to Second Mile she was underweight herself and was feeling ill. She was tested for tuberculosis but came up with a clean bill of health. Her story is like that of so many other women in Haiti.... a mother's illness affects a child's health. But too often mothers are separated from their children when they themselves are ill. Maternal illness and death are common reasons why Haitian children end up in the orphanages. The child is first separated at the time of health crisis, but sadly, it seems that the longer a mother remains ill and unable to receive treatment or answers, the more likely that mother and child will never be reunited. 

We are thankful that Milouse and Daniel didn't have to be separated and that mom's health issues seemed to resolve after a few good meals and rest. The stresses of not knowing whether or not she had a serious condition and whether or not she would be able to afford treatment combined with the stress of not knowing how she would get help for Daniel could have been enough to keep her sick.... the reduction of those stresses might have been the turning point for healing. 

At Second Mile we are working to improve health-seeking behaviors among women both for themselves and for their children. Each case is different, but part of our health education curriculum is teaching women where, when, and how to seek healthcare. Of course, knowing when and how to use a healthcare facility means nothing if a woman does not have the means to travel to hospital or to pay for treatment. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if every mother with could afford to nourish and care for herself, including regular check-ups? Wouldn't it be great if every family could head straight to the hospital in an emergency without worrying about how expensive medication will be if  a child is admitted? 

We can’t expect good outcomes if families don’t have enough money for food, shelter, and basic health care, much less savings for health emergencies. That's why the business program is set up to give these vulnerable and disadvantaged mothers the tools they need to run and sustain successful business. We're still working to make the program better, but we are learning so much with each new situation. 

Friday - Daniel and Mom packed and ready to go home for the weekend

#2 Mickey We also still have Mickey and his mother with us. His story is a bit more complex. I’m working out a blog post to share more of his hard and hopeful journey. Mickey is almost a year old. He weighs 12.7 lbs. When they first came to Second Mile he weighed only 8.8 lbs. 

#3 Bel Little Bel, age 3, just completed 4 weeks at Second Mile. She gained weight rapidly due to an affinity for Medika Mamba. She quickly moved from a diagnosis of “moderate acute malnutrition” to a weight that is average for children of her height. She made the jump from 16 lbs to 19 lbs in just 3 weeks. 

Friday, going home to Grandpa

While we are excited about Bel’s progress she still shows some lingering signs of poor nutrition. Her orange hair and her short stature are signs that she isn’t completely out of the woods yet. Any illness at this point could send her right back to where she started. The short stature you see in children who are undernourished has a technical name. It’s called stunting.

Stunting is present when children are exposed to a diet that is persistently lacking in essential micronutrients, such as iron, folic acid, and vitamin A. Without these and other essential nutrients children don’t grow and develop as they should. For example, even though a child's weight might be average compared to children of the same height, these “stunted” children are considerably shorter and don’t look as healthy as other children their age. Just about 1/3 of the world's children are stunted. (That's a big problem). Children who are stunted fall ill considerably more often than children who are not. Bel is the perfect example.

Bel's grandma shelling beans outside the Recovery Home. Bel's mom died 3 months ago.

Bel had cold symptoms all week and it affected her appetite. She lost a little bit of weight last weekend, then she stayed stable during the week. This small episode of illness gave us the opportunity to teach the all the moms about managing  the spread of germs among other children in their households. The moms learned about washing toys before they get into the hands of a smaller/more fragile child. They learned about the benefits of vitamin C and how important it is to increase the amount of liquids you give a child while he or she is sick. The good news is that Bel didn’t lose too much ground as a result of this cold. We praised the grandma for this! In fact, this week Bel showed one of the best signs of recovery: the energy to walk and play! She spent a few afternoons this week, getting creative with a basket full of building blocks. 

Bel and Grandma had to leave the facility on Friday because of a death in the family but she will be back for follow-up. As she continues to eat a diet rich in iron her hair should change and we should see progress in her height. One of our favorite things to note when kids come back for follow-up is how tall they are getting!  Along with weight gain, an increase in height (or length) is an excellent sign of overall improved nutritional status. 

Take Witchana for example. She sure has changed in 6 months time! 

                       Witchana at Second Mile (May, 2013)                              Witchana, 6 months later (Now, 2013)

#4 And finally, Loudjina is back at Second Mile, with mom, brother, and dad. 

You may remember an update in a recent blog post where we said that Loudjina had recently returned from a trip to a hospital in Port-au-Prince. Everyone was hoping that she would be scheduled for surgery during the trip. But then we learned from the family that nothing could be done for her severe case of hydrocephalus. But.. as it turns out... we have reason to believe that the family was confused and that the visiting physicians would have placed a shunt (to drain fluid via a tube from brain to abdomen) in January if only the family had been willing to stay for the entire week. But instead, after just two nights in Port-au-Prince they traveled back home to Cap Haitien. It was disheartening to learn of this discrepancy between the nurse’s story and the family’s story but we want to give Loudjina and her family a second chance at surgery if it is available to them. It is once again a possibility that a visiting surgical team will attempt to place a shunt. A few days ago, the nurse in charge of the program called Jenn and asked that she arrange for the family to return February 20th. 

Loudjina’s father is doing some work at our facility to earn the money they will need to travel back to Port au Prince. We thank the donors who have provided this transportation money as these are the funds that allow us to pay Loudjina’s father for the work he is doing. We believe this arrangement is best for the family as it allows them to have ownership over the money they will need when they go back. Having Loudjina’s dad at our facility during the day is also a great thing for Loudjina. Her mom just gave birth to their second child via C-section 4 weeks ago. Dad has been a big help feeding and dressing Loudjina, giving mom time to recuperate. We taught Loudjina’s entire family and some of the other moms how to lift and turn Loudjina using a 3-person method that will help prevent any more pressure ulcers from forming. She is getting 2 dressing changes per day for her existing wounds.

That's all for now.
More updates coming tomorrow! 

a "relaxed" Jenn

It has been a long time since I have written. Where do I even begin? Amy left Haiti on January 1st for two weeks. We decided very last minute that it would be a very timing for her to visit her family, and so she did. 

So despite my blog post title, "A relaxed Jenn" I was not very relaxed during these two weeks.

While she was gone Dadou and I took Loudjina to Port au Prince to get a CT scan and see if she could be a potential candidate for surgery. Loudjina is 18 month old with a condition called hydrocephalus. She has a build up of fluid in and around her brain. We met her 3 months ago. She and her mother stayed at Second Mile (during the normal Monday through Friday program) for 8 weeks. During this time we provided dressing changes for the four large pressure ulcers that had developed on Loudjina's head. We also worked to empower Loudjina's mom who was pregnant at the time with business and health education. Eventually she became very comfortable and skilled at changing Loudjina's dressings on her own. After we met Loudjina we contacted the only surgical program for children with hydrocephalus in Haiti and were instructed to bring her for a consultation in January.

So that's what we did. Let's just say that day ranks as one of my top 10 least favorite days of all time. We picked Loudjina and her grandma up early in the morning, 3 AM to be exact. We arrived at Bernard Mevs hospital in PAP around 8 AM. We made great time getting all the way from Cap Haitien to Port au Prince in 5 hours. Did you know that 3 years ago it used to be an 8 hour drive? See…Haiti is improving. The nurse that is in charge of the hydrocephelus program didn't arrive until 11 AM. That meant that Loudjina, and her grandma and I sat waiting for 3 hours. It would never be any big deal to sit with your average baby for 3 hours but Loudjina is not your average baby. Her head weighs close to 25-30 lbs (I am completely guessing here) so you can imagine how awkward it is to hold her for 3 hours. It's like an arm work-out., for um, 3 hours. This is not what made it one of my least favorite days. What made it one of my least favorite days was all the staring and comments that were directed towards Loudjina. People would say things like, "how is she not dead?" or "why did you not abandon her?" or "why is she not in an orphanage?" And when people stare here…they stare hard.

Loudjina and her mom, at there home, a few days before the trip

In fact, people will walk up and stand a foot away and just stare. I timed one of the stares and it lasted a full 78 seconds. Can you imagine, a 78 second stare from a person standing only a foot away? The nurses and doctors asked me several times why I didn't get her to PAP months ago, because the program for hydrocephelus is free. Over and over I had to tell them we just met Lovelie 3 months ago and started seeking medical attention the day we met her. I know how they feel though. I am irritated too.

Loudjina's family has known about the program ever since Loudjina was 3 months old and they took her there. We were told that she even received surgery at the time but that they never returned for follow-up because they didn't have the money to make the trip to PAP. That's frustrating and sad. I would have gladly handed over the bus ticket cost of $30 to get her to PAP a year ago, and just like that her head would be 25-30 lbs lighter. So the whole situation is frustrating. We left later that day after the nurse told us she would send the CT scan to the surgeons who are coming in 2 weeks.  They would decide if they could operate. The nurse told me to go ahead and make arrangements for Loudjina to head back to PAP on the Jan 17th., two weeks later. So we did. Loudjina, her dad, and her grandma all went back this past Friday. They spent two night in Port au Prince but the surgeons decided that nothing could be done. It was too involved. There is not a whole lot we can do now except love on this girl, check on her pressure wounds and make sure mom has all the supplies she needs to keep the wounds clean and healing. And we can pray for her family. I really want to thank everyone for keeping her in your thoughts and prayers. And a special thanks to the people that made donations towards the cost of travel. By the way, the reason Loudjina's mom didn't travel to Port-au-Prince is because she just had a C-section a few days before. She delivered a healthy baby boy.

In the two weeks Amy was gone, the PAP trip was the only day I was not at the land. I wanted to spend this time to really work on our existing and future sustainability projects. I gave this pep talk/speech to our gardeners:

I don't know how long God plans for me to be here. I can not show up everyday and have my main focus be on the gardens. I do not want to be the one to tell you to plant this and that and when to plant. We need to think about 3 things:

1. We need to always have produce to make meals for our moms and babies
2. We need to plan and rotate our crops more efficiently (so that we always have produce to make meals) 
3. We need to remember that sales from the gardens is what gives us a chance to hire more people!

So, I put a solid two weeks into training my new "side kick" Joseph. Joseph has been working with us since April 2012. He is now head gardner and is in charge of 4 other staff members. First things first. We solved an on-going problem with the irrigation system. Did I mention we were going on 56 days without rain? Yep, it was a stressful time. Joseph and I sat down and devised plans for rotating crops and inter-cropping plants. We picked seeds and decided how and when everything would be planted over the next 6 months. I really worked with him on leadership skills and managing people effectively so we can accomplish a lot of work in a short time. Because of the donations that came in the month of December we are now working with an additional 1.5-2 acres of gardening land. We were able to hire 20 part time employees during this new "garden-facelift" and we hired 2 more full-time staff members. It's always fun to hire people. It may be one of my favorite things in the entire world. 

the new gardening space (to the right of the fence)

Jenn, Joseph, middle (black shirt), with some of the other employees

Today Joseph made my day. I asked him when he had decided to plant sorghum. I expected him to have picked a day, sometime in the upcoming week. 

He responded, "I already planted them on Monday."

Amazing.

I asked him if we would be able to plant the next acre of corn and beans in two weeks? He said the land will be completely tilled by Friday and everything will be planted by Saturday.

Again, simply amazing.

I gave him praises up and down today. Sure I was a little hard on him during the last two weeks, but boy am I glad I was. Today he thanked me for showing him how to manage employees. He said, "I think I think like you now." That's a little funny that I have someone wanting to think like me. I am not sure I even want to think like me, but I will take it has a small compliment. 

Joseph, working into the afternoon

I have also invested a lot of time in Dadou and Kerline (our community health worker) lately. I think they are really starting to become a team. It's amazing the decisions that are being made without me. Slowly but surely they are taking initiative and feeling comfortable in their roles. Amy has even been able to spend less time at the land because Kerline is becoming proficient in all of the skills and tasks she set up for her to do. She is admitting kids, monitoring kids, teaching moms at every opportunity, and continuing to hold health classes. She also stays in touch with all of the moms who have graduated from the program and tracks the children's weight and health. When we increase the number of moms we are admitting we will be able to hire a Kerline #2. At that point, we're confident that Kerline #1 will be able to train Kerline #2. It's a fabulous system. Of course, our next health worker probably won't be named Kerline, but we've been referring to this mystery person as Kerline #2 for some time now. 

It's nice. Our facility is getting closer and closer to running without the "blans" aka foreigners. 

 

 So maybe now you are starting to see why my blog title is called a "relaxed Jenn." Oh, and let's not forget that a  huge part of why I am so relaxed is because our entire Holiday Catalog was funded! It's always nice when I can just work and plan for projects without being stressed about funds. So, this "relaxed Jenn" is going to end this post feeling thankful, relieved, and excited about the future of Second Mile.

Here are a few more pictures from January. 

Joslin and Verdieu harvesting carrots, our dog "tutu" likes to be in the mix

compost

hot peppers

neighbors came over to help with the green onion harvest, and to buy vegetables

a lone pumpkin

making new rows

planting Moringa trees

a prayer update

A little update:

We'll call this update little, because truth is, I don't exactly know where I'm going with the post. I just thought it felt like time to write one. How do I know when it's time?... that's easy, it's a little tingling feeling you get at the back of your elbow. ;)

But seriously I'm writing on the blog which, as I have previously confessed, usually means I'm trying to  avoid some other less-pleasurable assignment. And true to form, I'm in the middle of writing a summary of 2013, something to print off and mail to those of you who were praying, and giving, and following this past year. But it's painful! Not because the year hasn't been amazing. It has! It's just that its nearly impossible to squeeze twelve months into two pages. It's hard to summarize a million meaningful moments; it's hard to simplify things that aren't simple.

The moms, their stories... The influence of extended families, the poverty, the triumph, the injustice, and the little glimmers of hope that tell us its all worth it, are what shape our perspective of 2013. But you weren't there and you might not understand the significance of that moment, that action, that word. So how do we do we convey the capacity of these women in the midst of hardship?

We think this work is making a difference, but how do we prove that to you?

How do we tell you how amazing it feels
... to see moms walk back into our gate after months at home, carrying children you would now never peg for being a"sick baby," much less a victim of severe malnutrition
...to know that these moms are responsible for their children's good health, and that they are making it work -at home- on their own,
...to see their joy and confidence
...to know that Second Mile helped them realize their potential?

Hey maybe that's how I should start the 2013 letter. It feels amazing to see mothers walk back through our gates, carrying children that... 

And how can we possibly, adequately, thank all of you that have chosen to be a part of Second Mile this year? That's the biggest question of them all!

Jenn has databa-tized (it's a new word, i dare you to use it), all of the 473 individual donations we received online or by check this year. (Wow!) Everything is spreadsheet ready: names, addresses, and amounts donated. And I already bought all the goods to make tax-receipt preparation a smooth operation. I purchased the ink, and the stamps, the envelopes... well you get the picture. The busy work is actually all finished. Envelopes are addressed and stamped and it's borderline embarrassing to admit that, since the actual "letter" is far from finished.

At least the actual receipts are in progress.
But that glossy two-page insert we would like to include in your tax-receipts? Yeah... still working on it.

Blogging on the other hand? Much less pressure. Words can flow and can be patched together in any old way. What you get at the end is... well, what you get.

I'm hoping though, that talking about Second Mile and what's happening in Haiti as I type, will help get me in a groove and that I'll be able to produce a "Year in Review" san pwoblem.

So what's happening in Haiti?

Actually Jenn is in Haiti by herself. I am in Arizona. My family needed a visit, terribly. They were practically crying and begging me to come home. When they found out I wasn't coming home for Christmas (my first away in 26 years!) my brother sent a message that said, "WHHHHHYYY ARE YOUUUU ABANDONING USSSS!" True story. But actually they never did any begging. They wanted to see me, sure. But I also think Arizona is beautiful and the perfect place to get some R & R while also taking an opportunity to spend time with my superstar grandparents (ages 98, 90, and 88). I didn't make it home in time for Christmas but it seemed like good-sense to visit now, before we re-open our facility on January 13th.

We are currently in a doors-closed cycle. I don't know how else to call it. Twice a year we take a 3-week break to evaluate things, make sure we are approaching each situation in the best way possible, rotate the staff through a paid vacation schedule, rest and travel, and "fix what's broken."

For example, last year in July we closed down the facility to evaluate our "first two months." We decided to change the way we approached the moms businesses. Now, instead of receiving a $150 business on the day they leave, they receive a portion of goods worth a portion of that sum. Then as they demonstrate good judgement in business-related decisions and as they prove that they are investing their profits both into their child's recovery (i.e. the child is still gaining weight) and back into their business (i.e. the business is growing with new things we didn't initially give them), we make another investment into their business. Some moms have to show us that they are as invested as we are.

During this break Dadou (director, life-mentor, and teacher of the business courses) and Kerline (health educator, life-mentor, and community health agent) are visiting all 13 of the families, twice. Jenn is also really busy. She has had a ton of meetings and while managing things keeps her busy most of the time anyway, she's been extra busy trying to nail down a better crop rotation for the back gardens. She's my hero.

A few days ago we had a bit of a scare. We thought that Jiselle's little sister had died, the one that was born at Second Mile. We mourned the loss, tried not to dwell on what seemed like a failure, and accepted the death as a reality of life in Haiti. Then today, we learned that Kerline had misunderstood. Jiselle's newborn sister was well. The child that died was a neighbor of the family. You see, the moms that come through our program are well aware of the types of children we accept as cases. Before they leave, they understand the causes of malnutrition, what it looks like, and how to treat it. It's not uncommon for a mom to come back from a weekend at home with word about a child and mother they think needs our help. When they make recommendations they're usually right on. Jiselle's mom was unfortunately right in her assessment of this child's condition. A health agent from our partner organization saw the child and confirmed the referral. The child was severely malnourished and we had planned to bring the mom and baby in as soon as we re-opened on the 13th. But she didn't make it.

With the sad news came news of a mom in labor. Around here thats the type of news that fills you with a mix of fear and excitement. This morning I learned from Jenn that Loudjina's mom, Lovelie, the second of the two pregnant women we shared a portion of 2013 with, was going into labor. The number of women that die in Haiti during childbirth positions Haiti as the 34th worst country in the world in terms of maternal mortality. So... hearing that a women is in labor is well, nerve-wraking as much as it is exciting. But, Praise God, a beautiful baby boy was born via C-section. For now, all is well. Will you pray for mom and baby?

"Lovelie" (far right), pre-baby #2 

Speaking of prayer, we have a few more requests. I probably should have just called this 'the prayer update.' Maybe I will!

Loudjina, Jenn, Dadou, and Loudjina's grandma are travelling to Port-au-Prince early, early Monday morning for an appointment. She will have a CT scan and an evaluation to see if anything can be done surgically to ameliorate her condition. If something can be done, our hope is that she can return to Port-au-Prince later this month when there will be a pediatric neurosurgeon in Haiti. Can you pray both for safe travels and for the outcome of this visit?

Another very, very exciting piece of news is that Billens, the 9 year old son of Louisemene (Second Mile Haiti jewelry-maker) may be one-step closer to heart surgery. Billens was born with a congenital heart abnormality and many a visiting pediatric heart surgeon has recommended corrective surgery as his only option.

Billens, age 8, at 2012 staff Christmas party

But heart surgery is hard to come by in Haiti. In fact, prior to 2012 pediatric heart surgery in Haiti was really rare. As a matter of fact it is still really rare. But a new group called the Haiti Cardiac Alliance is taking on the task of making heart surgery more available to Haitian children. To start they are taking inventory of the children in Haiti who are currently living with heart conditions and placing the names of children who need surgery on a waiting list. The next goal is to match those children with surgical teams scheduled to operate in Haiti sometime within the next two years. Creating more surgical opportunities and training Haitian heart surgeons are subsequent goals. We were able to connect with that group and got the "okay" to have Billens and his mom travel to the center of Haiti to be seen at the new Partners in Health hospital this Tuesday. Louisemene is so excited. We actually met Louisemene because of Billen's heart condition. He has been a beloved little friend for over three years and she has been a treasured employee for almost two. For 9 years she's forged a tight relationship with God, trusting that he has Billen's life in his hands. For 6 months now she has been waiting for passports so that she could travel to the Dominican Republic where heart surgeries are performed twice a year. She's been waiting and trusting and praying for a long time. The opportunity to have the Haiti Cardiac Alliance evaluate Billens is an answer to a mother's prayer.

Louisemene and her three kiddos, one is adopted (I say that simply to point out a Haitian adoptive mom).

It's an answer to prayer for me too! I've written countless emails regarding his condition, reaching out to person after person that seemed connected in some way to pediatric heart programs. But the Haiti Cardiac Alliance wants to take away all that ambiguity. I'm awaiting news of their trip with much anticipation. Please pray for safe travels. They will simply be learning whether or not he will be placed on that waiting list, essentially whether surgery is feasible and whether he would be a candidate for an operation within the next two years.

Ok, so can you remember all that? Please pray for Jenn as she does both my job (which really isn't that demanding ;) and hers (which is very demanding) while I am in the States. Pray for safe travels to Port-au-Prince for Jenn and Dadou, and safe travels to the Central Plateau for Louisemene, and for hopeful news for Loudjina and Billens. Pray for the newest little siblings, Jiselle's little sister and Loudjina's new little brother. And please pray for the new moms and children we will be opening our doors to on January 13th.

Happy New Year, and don't forget to check your physical mailbox (wondering how many more years before those become obsolete.?.) but, give me a week, at least. ;)

Christmas miracles

I think it has been over 3 months since I have last written. That's intense.
But that doesn't mean I haven't had anything worth saying.. actually it's the opposite.

By the way I have not been able to talk for the last two days so I guess that's a sign saying I should write instead of trying to talk when nothing comes out.

I spent a good 9 days in the States this month. It was a quick but very effective trip. Might I add that it was freezing cold? I actually experienced a 100 degree temperature difference in one day. Yep, that's how cold it was. 

I met some amazing people and businesses while on my trip. It's always overwhelming for me to meet people who are interested in this story.. a story that takes place several thousand miles away. It's overwhelming when they are touched by people the people we are helping (or trying to help) that they don't even known and that likely they will never know on a personal level. One thing comes to mind… the body of Christ.

People kept saying to me, "you are his hands and feet" but over and over I kept thinking, "no, you are his hands and feet." You are making it possible for this ministry to exist and for us to serve people in Haiti even though you have no idea where we live or who we are serving. When you break it down that way… how awesome. How beautiful is the "body of Christ." Jesus said we must become disciples and extend our reach to all ends of the world. In order to extend love to all ends of the world we need people in every corner, people like the people I met in Wisconsin and Minnesota. 

My first-ever visit to a "real" Christmas tree farm.

I got back to Haiti last Tuesday afternoon. Boy, was I excited. While I was gone I caught a mean Minnesotean cold (which I wasn't too excited about). So I took the rest of Tuesday off out of consideration for the staff members and the moms. It just wouldn't have been good to show up to the land after traveling a day and a half. I can be a bit grouchy and gross (not having showered in a while). During this half-day off Amy and I took the opportunity to decorate a Christmas tree and make our apartment seem like we are in the Holiday spirit. We finally made the decision, just the day before, that it would be beneficial to the organization and us if we didn't leave for the holidays. We have too much going on with the moms, some possible surgeries, end of the year stuff, and just preparing for the New Year.

Don't worry about us. We have a list of Christmas movies that need to be watched before the 25th. I promise we won't skimp on any of the holiday festivities. We already kicked the movie-marathon off last night with The Christmas Story! We plan to be pretty traditional and I decided that we each get not one stocking, but two. We will have our own cookie decorating party with some of our friends here and we will have an awesome Staff party at the land. Oh, and this past weekend we met a couple "new friends" that all happen to be staying over the Holiday season as well. Be jealous... well don't be jealous but you can pretend you're jealous. 

Wednesday was the day. It was the day to see how Dadou (Haitian Director) did while I was gone. Dadou took over all my responsibilities which include finances, employment oversight, checking to see if mom/babies have everything they need, looking after all sustainable projects, and taking care of anything and everything that pops up.

He did well. He did really well. It's amazing to see how much Dadou has grown in 2 years time.

So good to know.. I can leave.

Amy was overwhelmed however with the amount of stuff she had on her plate the last week and a half. We had a decent amount of sick kids and two pregnant mommas to worry about on top of that. Our community health worker and Amy worked extra long hours. I think it's a perfect time to say how thankful I am for Amy and how our organization would be nothing if we didn't have her. I guess you can say we are a real team.

Amy and I decided on Thursday she would take the day off. A day off she very much deserved. It was one of those times where if she didn't have a day off she might crack. We do that every once a while but we are working on getting to the point of resting before the cracking begins.

Thursday was a unique day. A day I have never experienced before. I received a call early in the morning saying that one of the moms was in labor, and was asked what should we do. We have been thinking about this for awhile and had plans A, B, and C. Plan A was to have her give birth at the hospital where she has regular appointments (45 minutes away). Plan B was to have her give birth at the closest hospital and Plan C was to have the village birthing attendant deliver her baby at the land. We didn't have our truck (it was in shop) which was going to make Plan A and B difficult and we knew that the birth was going to happen extremely fast (this was her 8th delivery). We also knew that it was the mom's preference to give birth right there in her room with a traditional midwife assisting. She had had all of her other children at home. So I had them call the local birth attendant and let them know that I was heading out the door. Luckily I have my motorcycle so it took me only 10 mins to get to the land.

When I got to the facility, all the moms pointed to the room and made it clear that I should get in there fast! It was clear the baby was coming very very soon. Kerline (community health worker) and I ran all over the place finding blankets, bedding, gloves, alcohol, and anything else the birth attendant needed. 

It was happening fast. One of the other moms was holding and massaging the pregnant mom. She was telling her things like how to breathe and shooting up a couple prayers. I have never heard a prayer come out of this mom's mouth before nor did I ever expect this mom to be the one in the room helping with the delivery. It was part of what made the whole experience so remarkable.

Since I've never seen a baby born before you'll have to excuse me while I share my thoughts and emotions. Pretty much as soon as I arrived, I was told "it was happening." I grabbed the moms hand and continued to pray. It all happened so fast. I saw a head, and a whole lot of other stuff come out. I was maybe grossed out for 10 seconds but as soon as the rest of the body started to make it's way out I became overwhelmed with many emotions and all the grossness wasn't gross anymore.  I begin yelling wow, wow, wow. And "Merci Jezi." The baby was out.

I also remember saying, "this is AWESOME." I don't think I cried. But it's possible. 

It was all done in a matter of 5 mins.. All there was left to do was to examine the baby and cut the umbilical cord. I with leave out the rest of the details. But you can imagine that the birthing process looks a lot different here. 

The mom was tired. I heard cheering coming from the outside of the room. I heard Staff members yell "thank you Jezi." Everyone's first thought was to thank God. That too, made the experience beautiful.

Then all the moms went to work..  like they were on the same team and everyone knew what to do. One mom started to wash all the dirty sheets and clothes. Another mom started to mop and clean where the pregnancy took place. Another mom brought in water for the mom to drink. We wanted to send this mom to the hospital quick so everyone pitched in to help this mom and baby get prepared for the hospital. It was very beautiful. This picture of all the moms supporting each other was exactly what we envisioned when we dreamed up this place two years ago. It might be working out even better than we hoped for. Of course we weren't planning to have a mom give birth at our place, it's definitely not in our mission statement, but it was good to know that in this mom's moment of need each one of the other women cared for her and each other like they were on the same team, like they were sisters. It was clear that day that we were one big family/community. The rest of the day the moms watched her 2 year old daughter Jiselle, who is still on a 'round the clock feeding schedule.

Acts 2 anyone?

We care for each other no matter what condition a mom has or how little her baby is or even how difficult/rough her life is… no one is judged. We are all the same. That day I was feeling a overwhelmed amount of thankfulness. A thankfulness for life. A thankfulness for God giving us a vision and us being able to be a part of this very "awesome" story. 

The things you sometimes hear when your car breaks down.

I'm sort of good at procrastination. And by that I mean that I am extremely good at being wildly productive while doing tasks of very low priority in order to avoid doing something less-enjoyable of significantly greater priority.

Sweeping, sorting photos in Dropbox "for the organization," and writing blog posts are a few of my go-to tricks when I want to avoid doing something. Oh and if you ever need a tutorial on "how to discover pure musical genius on You-Tube," I can help you out there too. It's another one of my hidden talents.

Tonight, I'm not writing an overdue paper for a class I may or may not regret having signed up for in the first place. Please don't tell the professor. (Just kidding, it's a great class!)

And with that I bring you a story about a mom and a girl that are sort of inseparable.

I want to write about this mom today. We call her Lovelie. 

Her daughter Loudjina is 17 months old. 

She’s been doing this every day for 17 months. And we’ve seen her everyday for almost 2. If she ever gets tired of holding, feeding, loving, and kissing her daughter I've never seen the evidence. 

Each and every movement means something. Their day together is like dance. They are incredibly in sync.

Loudjina is exceptionally communicative. And her mom can elicit a response with ease. She can calm Loudjina in seconds. Loudjina might be upset about not having Tampico... or milk... and mom can distract her by talking about her dad. Or laying next to her and joking with her about how she won’t let her momma off the hook, not even for a second. Her mother's words calm her. Her expression turns peaceful. She is still. She is content. Her mom's presence causes her to forget about whatever was hurting her or making her upset. 

It's sort of incredible to watch actually. It’s not like your average 18-month old who finds comfort by being scooped up in a soothing embrace, only to wriggle free after a few moments and waddle back to the play place. Although, I don’t deny that Loudjina definitely finds comfort in mom's arms. This is most evident in the way she lies silently in her mom's lap, while balanced awkwardly on the side of her head, a process necessary so that her wounds can be cleaned, assessed, and re-dressed. It's awkward, but she doesn't cry and she sometimes sleeps. She trusts that her mom won’t let her fall. 

But more than just being held, Loudjina’s relationship with her mom is very much a face-to-face one. She cries and mom is there. Mom talks to her. She squirms. She waves her hands. She rubs her head. She knocks on the bed where her bottle is located. She taps on her tummy when she is hungry.

 And when all her other needs are met and all she needs is mom, she puts her hand by her lips. I think that means, “mom, can you just come close to me?” 

On Tuesday... Loudjina’s mom had an appointment at the local hospital. She is 8 months pregnant and was getting some lab tests done. We expected Lovelie to be gone from 7 am - 3 pm so her mother, Loudjina's grandma came to stay with her while she was away. Loudjina wasn’t a happy camper. Well, things started out okay at first. Since it was Loudjina's dad that drove Grandma to our facility on a moto she got to spend some face-to-face time with her papa; there's no a better way to start the day! But after dad left, she started missing mom. She wasn't making it easy on Grandma. I decided to go ahead and do her dressing changes. When I finished, Grandma offered to keep Loudjina resting on her side for awhile to relieve pressure on the sores. This is an important part of wound care, I was totally on board. Loudjina was not. 

This is the part where I would like to stop and tell you a million reasons why I love and respect Loudjina's grandmother. But talking about her would likely extend this post far beyond an acceptable length so I will limit myself to just one reason. Let's just say, she cares about the people in her family, a whole lot. Her newest grandchild is a 6 week old baby boy. She personally takes him to the hospital once a week for casting appointments. The baby was born with bilateral club feet. Routine casting is the prescribed course of action; first weekly, then bi-weekly, and finally monthly. She went to three hospitals before arriving at one that could do the casting. It takes almost an hour to get to this hospital and it costs an arm and a leg to get there. But, I'm pretty sure she would stop at nothing to make sure this baby gets a chance to walk. She's tenacious. She cares. 

Unfortunately, Loudjina didn’t really see or appreciate her Grandma’s patience and sincere desire to help her heal. She was just upset about lying on her side. 

Apparently, when mom came back from the hospital Loudjina straight up "told on" on Grandma. She brought her arms to the sides of her head to indicate that Grandma had "forced" her to lie on the sides of her head. Oh the drama! When Dad came to pick up his mother-in-law, they all laughed about it. Whenever Dad, Mom, and Grandma are together all they do is talk about Loudjina.

So Loudjina missed her mom.  But something tells me that Lovelie missed Loudjina just as much. 

All day today she kept saying, “I can’t leave you, can I?” “Not even for a day.” 

She would follow this with: “I’m going to have to make you forget me, aren’t I?” 

But of course she doesn't really intend to make good on her threat. She says this with her faced smashed as close to Loudjina’s as is physically possible. 

***

I shared an interesting moment with this mom on our way to the land on Monday. Our truck had a bit of a malfunction just after I picked the pair up from their house. We hadn’t made it more than a hundred yards, but the car was no longer drive-able. 

Before long a swarm of people engulfed the car. First one, than 20. And they weren’t interested in me. 
There were a few comments about my foreign-ness. And a few helpful suggestions, like “go buy gas, blan!” 

Which was funny... I don't know much but I do know how to tell whether a car needs gas, And that was not the problem.

But I didn’t respond to the 'blan' comments because the real reason they were peering into the windows and then running off to tell their friends had nothing to do with me. Most of the people knew Lovelie. They had even seen Loudjina before, when she and her head were both much smaller. But others had simply never seen a child like Loudjina.

In fact the majority of comments revolved around the fact that Loudjina appeared to be so much like a "normal child" in so many ways.

“Oh my, she has beautiful hands!” 

“She has such long hair!” 

“Her body is so normal, it’s not even small!” 

“It’s just her head that’s big!” 

"She's a beautiful child!"

But then the comments started to get a little too "up close and personal" for Lovely’s taste. 

She started giving some responses that made Loudjina seem like quite the little miracle. 

“I thought she was boy! She’s a girl Love?” ...”She’s always been a girl.”  True  

“She holds a bottle?” “yes, by herself.”  True

“She eats???” “yes, totally by herself.”  Mmm... not totally true

“Can she sit?” “yes, I help her sit.” A bit of a stretch. 

“Does she talk?” “yes, she says Mama and Papa.” Nope. Not true at all! 

I turned around and winked at her when I heard that one. Loudjina doesn’t talk. (However, she does enjoy her food quite loudly, which in terms of volume is much the equivalent of talking). But these neighbors, mutually uninterested and too interested, didn’t need to know that. So, maybe she told a few un-truths. Frankly, I’m kind of glad she did. These people were asking what felt to her like annoying questions about a child, her child, whom she sees as nothing but normal. She painted a perfectly "normal" picture of her daughter, a picture she sees daily, for people who wouldn't understand her value by any other definition. 

I’m afraid the chatter didn’t stop there. We were waiting for at least 30 minutes before my “help” arrived. 

A few of the remarks were simply unhelpful, and rude.  

Like, “you should go the hospital with her.” Brilliant! 

Or,  “why didn’t you just throw her away in the city?” Awful. 

Yes. Someone really did say that. 

And mom’s reply was sassy and pointed. “Why, because she’s a problem for me?”

The people surrounding our car were some of Cap-Haiten’s poorest. People move to this particular area when they cannot afford any other place to live. And our car broke down directly between “the Project,” a block of one-room homes that were been built by a charity organization, and a garbage pile the size of a swimming pool. This area is known for flooding and there is substantial rainfall this time of year. Navigating the dirt paths and the deep puddles is challenging. Let’s just say that wasn’t my first time being “stuck” near Lovelie's house. I'm almost convinced that the nasty mud pits are precisely why the garbage trucks which normally patrol the city wisely avoid this area.  Getting stuck just wouldn’t be worth it. Many generations of poverty were present in the crowd. Grandmothers, standing next to teenagers; both, with babies on their hips. It was nine o'clock in the morning and our car was surrounded. Neither work, nor school, compelled them to be elsewhere. 

So...not overly surprisingly, in this setting it may be more than a fleeting thought for some people, I suppose, to dispose of a child that everyone is telling you won't live anyway. Especially, when the future they speak of would most assuredly be more of a strain on you and your living family members that anything you could possibly imagine surviving. And you've survived a lot. So there's that. And not to mention, the enormous pressure you feel by people who are likewise stressed and traumatized by life's hard knocks. They are telling you that you will not, and should not have to, survive mothering this child. It will be too hard, they say. 

To be fair, the guy who made that final comment was a sarcastic teen, not more than 20. But these same messages can come from dads, grandparents, older sisters, noisy neighbors, and family members who expect to be heard and heeded...

Loudjina and Lovelie have been staying with us during the weekdays for 8 weeks.
Loudjina is growing. Her wounds are slowly changing and healing. We are pursuing surgery.
If the thought of giving up has ever crossed mom's mind, it hasn't shown.

Finally, 

One woman (one of the first to come over to the car) left her spot in front of Loudjina's window to give others a better view. She moved to the driver's side and was standing quite close to me. I could hear her clearly. “This life...” she said shaking her head, simultaneously burdened by and thankful for it in the same breath. 

“God gave me two healthy kids," she acknowledged. "It could have been another way...” 

It was as if seeing her neighbor, pregnant, and seated with a visibly heavy, disabled child lying across her lap and drinking from a bottle with two "beautiful hands" had brought her face-to-face with the uncertainty of motherhood and of life itself. Metaphorically, it was heavy. Of all the comments I heard that morning, I was probably most touched by hers. 

....

                 

Today...four days after the incident, Lovelie brought it up again. 

“Did you know that those people we saw on Monday, were the same people that told me to throw her away?” 

"...I would never."